Today, I'm not going to focus on writing about what physically went on at the time of me in the beginning of my sickness, But more about what went on spiritually.
I remember before every appointment, my family and I would get on our knees and pray. I believe and I've seen it in my life that when we ask the Lord for guidance, direction, strength, wisdom, joy, etc, he makes that true and real but that takes trials, discipline, tribulations, and just simply the opportunity to be molded, if we allow him too.
My whole Christian walk, I've always prayed for God to mold me and shape me. For him to make me more like Christ and in his true image. I know many of us have prayed that prayer before, but do we truly realize what that means when we speak those words out loud? Many times we ask the Lord for these things in our lives, for strength, wisdom, courage, etc. But how do we get those things? Not by just waking up one day and being a new person but by going through the proper training in life to become that person.
We ask "God Give me strength", "God give me patience" so God provides us with opportunities in our lives to grow and receive these things. He puts us in situations where we begin to learn to fully rely on him, to fully trust him and have faith that he is building us up to become more Christ like. Often times, when we are in difficult places in our lives, we ask God "why" but in those moments, we forget that the very situations we are in our lives is going to fulfill the very prayers that we have been asking for. We should not be asking God "Why" but instead God, "What?" What can I learn from this? What are you trying to teach me? God, "How" How do I overcome this? How can I praise your name in this difficult time? How can I grow from this situation?
When the storm comes.. understand that God never left you because God never leaves you. But instead, he is allowing this because he simply loves you. He is allowing you to be molded, to be shaped, to grow, and to become the very person you have been praying to be. It says in 1 Peter 5: 10 - But the God of all grace, who hath called us unto his eternal glory by Christ Jesus, after you have suffered a while, he shall make you perfect, establish, strengthen, and settle you. and in Deuteronomy 31:8 "It is the Lord who goes before you. He will be with you; he will not fail you or forsake you. Do not fear or be dismayed."
My answer is simple, My circumstances do not define my God. My sickness isn't a curse but instead, ironically, it has been and is one of the biggest blessings of my life. I never asked God "Why" I just always knew in my heart, not only would I be healed but I would be changed. This is teaching me faith in the complete unseen, teaching me to trust when there is uncertainty, teaching me to have hope in what seems hopeless and it's teaching me to have strength in my weakness..
God hasn't forsaken me, but instead blessed me. He has blessed me with the opportunity to become a living, breathing testimony for his name, to become closer to who he calls us to be.
God hasn't forsaken me, God has answered my prayer.
Picture taken by: Wendy Bobarikin www.bobarikin.com
0 comments:
Post a Comment